


Fading

by feentanz



Category: Nikolai Series - Leigh Bardugo, The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: AU where your eyecolour matches your soulmate's hair, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-01 19:56:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20386933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/feentanz/pseuds/feentanz
Summary: “So you’re saying the hot stranger is your soulmate then?” She clicked her tongue in amusement. Genya gave her a confused look. “Zoya doesn’t believe in soulmates. Right?” Zoya didn’t reply. She was too busy watching Nikolai during the window, who was standing outside talking to a few other guys she didn’t know. Even looking at him made her feel odd. “Of course she does”, Alina was saying now. “Look how she’s staring at him.”





	Fading

“Come on, Zo”, Genya giggled over her drink, almost spilling the cocktail all over herself. “You can’t tell me none of these guys hold up to your standards!” 

They were seated on one of the vast leather sofas, cigarette smoke clouding the air around them. Genya was on her fourth drink, but Zoya was hardly in the mood to drink tonight. Or party, for that matter. She was only here because Genya and Alina had dragged her along. 

Alina was sitting down on Genya’s other side now, her bright red eyes sparkling as she smirked. “Zoya prefers to look miserable and sulk all night”, she commented, clicking her tongue. 

Genya gave her a soft smile as she laced her fingers through her girlfriend’s. Well, they weren’t just girlfriends. Also _ soulmates, _apparently. 

Not that Zoya believed in that fairytale story, but if you saw Genya and Alina you might as well start believing. Alina’s hair was light silver - the result of a long night of hair dye - but her natural hair was a deep brown, just the shade of Genya’s eyes. And surprisingly, Genya’s bright auburn hair matched Alina’s eyes. A match made in heaven, apparently. If you chose to believe in such magic. 

Zoya snorted, sinking deeper into the sofa as she nipped on her vodka mix. Not even that would get her in the mood today. 

Just in this moment, the door to the living room was opened. A cool midnight breeze swept inside as someone stepped into the room, someone who managed to somehow immediately catch Zoya’s attention. Perhaps it was due to the bright blue hair, or perhaps because he was truly unreasonably handsome. 

“He’s hot”, Alina commented, raising her glass and grinning. 

Genya followed Zoya’s eyes knowingly as they watched the stranger step outside into the garden again. “Your type?” 

Zoya huffed. “I don’t think so”, she replied sharply, setting her still full glass down on the table. “I’m going out for a smoke.” 

Alina was giggling and Genya smirking, but Zoya ignored both of them as she left the room and stepped into the garden as well, reaching for the pack of cigarettes in her bag and lighting herself one. 

The stranger was standing a few paces away from her, his gaze suddenly lifting as he noticed her. As his eyes met hers, Zoya froze. A shiver ran over her spine, something so inexplicably foreign to her that she couldn’t have explained it. She nearly dropped the burning cigarette. 

“Smoking kills, you know”, the stranger commented, a grin tucking at his lips as he stepped closer. His eyes were a pretty hazel colour, a shade Zoya only knew too well. 

Instinctively, she brushed a hand through her hair. Her hair which was the exact same shade. Even in the dim light, it was pretty much obvious. 

“I’m Nikolai”, the stranger added, as she didn’t answer. Another grin, as his eyes were scanning her face. Perhaps noticing the deep blue of her eyes. 

Zoya took a drag from her cigarette. “Zoya”, she replied, trying to sound as unbothered as she usually did. 

Nikolai smirked, watching her for a moment. “You have beautiful eyes”, he said eventually. 

Usually, that would have been a cheesy compliment, but she knew quite well what he was implying. _ But she didn’t believe in soulmates. _“Not a very creative compliment”, she remarked, blowing some smoke into his face with a smile. 

Nikolai huffed. “You’re hard to impress, aren’t you? Good thing I’m very charming.” 

And arrogant, apparently. Zoya rolled her eyes, snipping some ash away with her finger. “Is that your natural hair colour?” She couldn’t help it, she had to ask. Perhaps it was only a big coincidence after all. 

Nikolai shrugged. “Somehow, yes. I’ve always wondered when I’d meet the perfect blue eyed girl.” His gaze was resting on her. 

“You want me to help looking for her?” Zoya replied sweetly, taking another drag from her cigarette. “I’m sure she’s around somewhere.” 

Nikolai’s eyes lit up at the words, and he slipped a little closer to her. “You don’t believe in soulmates I take it?” 

Zoya tried to ignore the feeling in her stomach as his eyes continued to rest on her, the way even his presence seemed to put her on edge. “No”, she replied, but not quite with her usual sharpness. “I don’t.” Her cigarette had gone out already, and she quickly flicked it away with her fingers. She felt the strong urge to light a second one, only to occupy her hands. 

“Why not?” Nikolai wanted to know, tilting his head while still looking at her. He truly had very pretty eyes. “I think it’s quite the romantic concept, isn’t it?” 

_ Romantic. _Right. Zoya gave a half shrug. “I don’t really care”, she replied, although it didn’t even sound convincing to herself. She crossed her arms in front of her chest, slightly shivering in the cool air. Of course she had forgotten her jacket inside, and was now only wearing her thin dress. 

Like he had read her mind, Nikolai slipped out of his leather jacket. Zoya opened her mouth to protest, but he had already draped it around her shoulders, in the process slipping alarmingly close to her. The leather smelled of his aftershave, the scent making her almost dizzy for a brief moment. But then he let go of her again, stepping back. “Better?” he wanted to know, giving her a half smile. 

Zoya met his eyes for a second, pulling the jacket closer around her shoulders. “Thank you”, she only muttered, not quite knowing what else to do. “I’ll give it back to you later.” 

Nikolai smirked at those words, running a hand through his tangled hair. “How about you give it back tomorrow?” he suggested. “When we go out for coffee.” 

Now that was a bold move. Zoya raised a brow at him. “What makes you think I like coffee?” 

He chuckled. “Just a feeling”, he replied, adding a half shrug. Then he reached out for her hand, suddenly pulling her closer. Zoya tensed as he reached into the pocket of his jacket, his breathing brushing over the skin of her cheek in the process. She could feel herself shivering again. 

Nikolai was handing her his phone, giving her a confident smile in the process. Usually, Zoya would have been tempted to refuse, turn on her heel and walk away just to see that arrogant expression drop, but something was holding her back. Something about the way his eyes were clinging to hers. 

And so she took the phone from him, typing her number into the keypad and adding _ soulmate _as her name before she handed it back. 

Nikolai flashed a grin as he noticed. “I’m hoping you didn’t give me a fake number just to get rid of me”, he remarked, although not sounding seriously worried. 

Zoya rolled her eyes at the words. “If I had wanted to get rid of you, you would already be gone”, she replied, and somehow it sounded like a compliment, although she gave her best to make her tone harsh. 

“I can see that”, Nikolai replied with a smirk, and even that sounded like a compliment. “I’ll text you about tomorrow”, he added, glancing towards the living room for a brief second. “Your two friends are waiting for you to come back inside I think.” 

Zoya was aware of Alina and Genya watching her every move ever since she had started chatting with Nikolai, but she had hoped he might not be noticing. “Great”, she muttered in response, giving him one last look and then pushing the door open again. “You better don’t make me wait”, she commented, giving him a sweet smile and then disappeared inside. She could hear him laughing before the door fell shut. 

Genya was already waiting inside, giving Zoya an expectant look. “What did you talk about?” she asked immediately, her eyes glowing from excitement - and a good portion of alcohol. Alina was coming up after her, sipping on yet another cocktail. 

Zoya shrugged in response, letting her fingers run over the soft leather of the jacket. She didn’t feel like taking it off just yet. “Did you notice his hair?” she said instead, giving Genya a thoughtful look. 

Her friend frowned, blinking a few times as if she needed to regain her focus. She was definitely _ very _drunk. “They’re blue”, she commented. 

“Wow, I didn’t notice that myself”, Zoya muttered, giving her an annoyed glance. “They’re the same shade as my eyes.” 

Now that was enough to make Genya listen. “_ What?” _she blurted out, so loud that Alina almost dropped her drink. 

“Saints, babe, relax”, she muttered in her girlfriend’s direction, before casting a smile at Zoya. “So you’re saying the hot stranger is your soulmate then?” She clicked her tongue in amusement. 

Genya gave her a confused look. “Zoya doesn’t believe in soulmates. _ Right?” _

Zoya didn’t reply. She was too busy watching Nikolai during the window, who was standing outside talking to a few other guys she didn’t know. Even looking at him made her feel odd. 

“Of course she does”, Alina was saying now. “Look how she’s staring at him.” 

Those words made Zoya tear her eyes away, and she quickly cleared her throat. “He asked me out for tomorrow”, she noted, crossing her arms. “Should I go?” 

Genya huffed. “Of course you’re going!” 

Alina had emptied her cocktail by now. “I bet his hazel eyes are very pretty, right?” 

Zoya gave her an annoyed glance. She was terrible as soon as she touched alcohol. “I’m going home”, Zoya declared, tearing her gaze away from Nikolai. “You want me to drop you off at your place?” After all, she was still pretty sober. 

Alina was pouting, but Genya nodded. “We should probably go.” 

When they left the room, Zoya could have sworn she felt Nikolai’s lingering gaze on her back. 

It was 12pm the next day when Zoya’s phone lit up with a text from Nikolai, a fact which already made her quite mad in itself. _ How could he have waited so long to text her? _At first she was tempted not to reply at all, but somehow she couldn’t quite bring herself to it. And so she typed her reply only a mere minute later, sending him her address so he could pick her up. Now that was truly pathetic. 

When the doorbell rang half an hour later, Zoya made sure to wait a couple of extra seconds before making her way downstairs from her flat, not failing to notice that Nikolai had arrived in nothing else but a cabriolet. Quite the impressive one, too. 

She gave him a questioning smile as she sank down on the seat next to him, throwing his leather jacket onto the backseat. “Nice car”, she commented, running a hand through her hair. “Are you rich or something?” Probably a rude question, but she didn’t quite care. 

Nikolai laughed at the words, starting the engine and rolling back onto the street. “My dad is quite wealthy if you want to know, yes.” 

“So you live off your father’s money?” Zoya countered, letting her sunglasses sink down onto her nose. She was glad Nikolai was now occupied with watching the street and couldn’t stare at her anymore. 

He was shaking his head. “I work in his company. One day I might inherit it.” He gave her a quick smile. 

Just in this moment, she realized how little she even knew about him. Nothing really apart from his name and his age, and that only because Genya had done a quick Instagram search on the car ride home the night before. She really was excellent at stalking people. But at least now Zoya knew that Nikolai was 23. 

“What are you doing except standing around at parties looking bored?” Nikolai interrupted her thoughts, his eyes sparkling with amusement. 

Zoya huffed, blowing a strand of hair away from her face. “I’m studying law.”  
  
Now that caught his attention. “Really?” Nikolai gave her a questioning glance, before returning his attention to the street. They were almost in the city center now. 

“Why is that such a surprise?” Zoya wanted to know, although she had gotten that reaction quite a few times already. Apparently most guys didn’t believe that a girl could be pretty and smart. 

Nikolai smiled, while steering the car into one of the city’s parking lots. “It isn’t actually. You would be pretty terrifying in court.” 

She rolled her eyes, although she couldn’t help the little smile which tucked at her lips. But she didn’t quite want to admit to herself how much she was enjoying Nikolai’s company so far. Or admit it to him, for that matter. 

After Nikolai had finished parking the car, Zoya made sure to push open her door and get out before he even got the idea of opening the door for her, which made her earn an amused smirk from his side. No comment, though. Good for him. 

Nikolai suggested that they sat down in a small cafe he apparently knew quite well, and since Zoya wasn’t in the mood to start a discussion she followed along. He asked her all sorts of questions about her studies in the process, his genuine interest surprising her. Usually she didn’t get that with guys. 

“Do you have any family in the city?” Nikolai asked eventually, as they had sat down in a spot near the window. 

Now that was not exactly one of her favourite topics. “No”, Zoya replied hesitantly, debating how much she wanted to open up on this first date. Although she honestly felt like Nikolai already knew her better than most people did. “My aunt lives a few hours away”, she chose to add. 

His eyes watched her attentively as she said it, as he sipped on his newly arrived coffee. “What about your parents?” 

Not even Genya had ever asked that. She had just accepted it as part of the mystery Zoya liked to spin around herself. “They’re somewhere else”, Zoya answered, adding a half shrug. “I don’t know where.” That was the truth. She hadn’t seen her mother since she had ran away at nine, to her Aunt’s house, and her father had disappeared long before that. 

Nikolai nodded. “I don’t know my real father either.” 

Zoya's brows shot up. “I thought his money paid the car.” 

His lips curled up in a smile as he leaned back in his chair, running a hand through his hair. “He’s my stepfather. My mother had an affair.” 

_ Oh. _Zoya bit her lip, not quite knowing what to reply to that. She sipped on her coffee instead. Offering comfort was not really one of her strengths. 

But Nikolai was smiling already, still watching her. “So you don’t believe in soulmates”, he remarked, sounding mostly amused. 

Zoya glared at him. “No, I don’t”, she replied dismissively. Although… there was something here that she couldn’t deny, some spark between them. Something which seemed to pull her towards Nikolai, and the fact that she felt like she had totally known him longer than just a day. 

“Should I take it personally?” he asked, putting his empty cup of coffee down. “Perhaps my charm doesn’t work on you.” 

Zoya huffed, giving her best attempt to hide her smile. “Perhaps you’re just not as charming as you like to believe”, she countered, keeping her eyes trained on him. It was almost impossible to look away once she had started. 

“Ouch”, he commented, frowning in mock despair. “That hurt. You’ll make a great lawyer.” 

Zoya laughed as Nikolai called the waitress to their table, asking to pay. She had not even noticed how much time had passed. Or, how much she had enjoyed Nikolai’s company today. 

“Do you want me to drop you off at your place?” Nikolai asked eventually, as they made their way back to his car. 

Somehow, Zoya wasn’t quite ready to let the date end just yet. She played with a strand of her hair, avoiding to look at him. “You could stay for a bit”, she offered eventually, actually feeling _ nervous _about asking. That was an emotion she didn’t usually feel. 

Nikolai gave her a surprised look, unlocking his car and this time making sure he was there to open the door for her. It earned him an disapproving glance from Zoya, but she climbed inside all the same. “Sure”, he answered her question as he sat down as well, giving her another quick glance. 

Zoya was silent for the rest of the drive, suddenly feeling like she had made a mistake. Not that this was the first time she had ever invited someone back to her place after a date, but somehow… it felt different. She felt nervous and weirdly on edge, as if she had something to prove. Which was very unlike herself.

Nikolai parked the car in front of Zoya’s house and then followed her upstairs. When she unlocked the door and led him into her flat, she felt even more like this had been a mistake. Like never even should have accepted to go on a date with him. 

“You live alone?” he wanted to know when walking through the corridor, into the small living room area. 

Zoya nodded, leaning against the doorframe. “Genya lives next door with her girlfriend.” A fact which was sometimes a curse and sometimes a blessing. Especially when those two decided on a surprise visit. 

Nikolai turned back around, now facing her again. He was standing awfully close. “Are they soulmates?” he wanted to know, giving her another one of those looks where it was impossible to turn away. “I didn’t fail to notice your friend’s red eyes.” 

Zoya cleared her throat, trying to ignore the odd feeling in her stomach. By now, she could feel Nikolai’s breathing brushing over her skin. “I suppose they are”, she replied, looking up at him and making the mistake to get caught in his gaze. 

She didn’t dare to move as he shifted even closer, her back now pressed against the cool wood of the doorframe. Nikolai’s fingers tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, then brushed over the skin of her neck. The movement sent a shiver racing over her skin. 

And then when he leaned down to kiss her, Zoya’s brain completely shut off. Her arms curled up around his neck as she pulled him closer, opening her lips under his, feeling the warmth of his body pressed against hers. And she was craving more. She got onto her tiptoes to reach up to his height, slipping closer, desperately closing the space between them. 

Zoya was barely thinking when she opened the buttons of his shirt, letting her fingers trace the muscles on his back as the fabric fell. It was like she was caught in a trance, unable to escape once she had felt his lips against hers. Nikolai was busy getting her shirt off, revealing her lace bra underneath. She shivered as she cool air brushed over her bare skin. 

And then, just in that moment, the doorbell rang. 

Zoya broke away so suddenly she stumbled back against the doorframe, taking an uneven breath. _ What had just happened? _

Nikolai looked equally confused, his now very messy hair falling into his face. He gave her a thoughtful look, but didn’t speak. 

Actually, Zoya knew very well who would be on the door. There was only one person annoying enough to ring on her door in the middle of the day. She didn’t bother getting dressed again, but instead rushed into the corridor and opened the door in only her bra. 

Alina was standing on her doorstep, twisting a strand of silver hair around her finger. Her eyes widened as she noticed Zoya’s outfit, and she paled when Nikolai stepped into the picture, after all still shirtless. “Oh”, she exclaimed flatly. “Sorry to interrupt.” 

Obviously, she was not sorry at all. Zoya knew that all too well. “What do you want?” she muttered, crossing her arms in front of her pretty much exposed chest. 

Alina blinked a few times, her gaze jumping in between Nikolai and Zoya. “Um”, she began. 

Just in this moment, Genya was slipping into the hallway. “Hi”, she interrupted, waving at Nikolai. “I’m Genya. This is Alina.” Alina only gave an uneasy smile. 

Zoya snorted. This was just perfect. “What do you _ want? _” she repeated her question, now truly annoyed. 

“I texted you, and you didn’t reply”, Genya said, still busy examining Nikolai’s outfit. “So I wanted to see if you were alright.” She added a smile, giving Zoya a knowing glance. 

Zoya blew a strand of hair away from her face. “Then you can leave now, right?” She gave Genya a last smile, then pushed the door shut. This was seriously getting out of hand. 

“Charming”, Nikolai commented with a smirk on his lips. “Do your friends always stop by to see what you’re doing when you have guys over?” 

Actually, no. “Very funny”, Zoya muttered, giving him a sour look. Apparently Genya had made it her personal mission to make Zoya’s life harder today. Poor Alina was only dragged along. 

Nikolai chuckled, reaching for her hand and drawing her closer again. Zoya felt her heart skipping a beat when his hands wrapped around her waist, suddenly lifting her up. “Where were we?” he muttered into her ear, his lips now tracing her neckline. 

Zoya found it increasingly hard to breathe, something she wasn’t used to either. “I can’t quite remember right now”, she was able to get out when Nikolai let her down on the couch in the living room, now on top of her. 

His eyes seemed to be a shade darker when he looked up at her.“I’ll make sure you remember next time”, he whispered against her skin, his lips now claiming hers again. 

And he made good on that promise. 

It was dark outside when Nikolai left, the moon already high in the sky. Zoya had no idea how late it was, because somehow she seemed to have forgotten all sense of time. Instead she had found herself entangled in his arms for hours, not wishing to ever get up again. 

She might have asked him to stay the night, but she had class the next morning, and the distraction wouldn’t reflect all too well on her grades. Instead she had been invited to his place the next day, an offer she was still thinking about whether to accept or not. 

It was after midnight when she knocked on Genya’s door, and was greeted by a sleepy Alina in a bright yellow pajama. “Oh hi”, she muttered, waving Zoya inside. “I thought your guest might stay overnight.” 

Zoya ignored the comment, instead making her way to the living room, where Genya was sitting with her laptop working. 

“You look like you had fun”, Genya commented immediately, eyeing the purple hickey all too visible on Zoya’s neck. 

She chose ignore that as well, sitting down next to her friend. Alina had disappeared in the bedroom again. “I don’t know what to do”, she admitted. “I hardly know him, but it feels like-” 

Genya closed the laptop. “Like you’ve known him forever”, she finished the sentence. “I know the feeling”, she added, eyes darting towards the bedroom. “I felt the same way.” 

Zoya frowned hesitatingly. “I don’t believe in soulmates”, she said again. Everytime she said it it sounded less convincing. 

Genya gave her a long look. “Even if you don’t”, she offered. “You still really like him, don’t you?”  
  
She just knew her too well. Zoya played with the sleeve of her shirt, picking on a loose thread, just when her phone screen lit up. Her eyes immediately traveled towards it, as she saw Nikolai’s name on the display. _ I’ll pick you up tomorrow at 6, _the message was saying, and those words were enough to make Zoya smile a little bit. 

Genya gave a dramatic sigh. “Now you’re smiling at your phone, Saints, where is the Zoya I know?” 

“Shut up”, Zoya muttered in response, glaring at her friend. “Next time he’s here, don’t you dare to come over!” 

Genya only giggled, opening her laptop again. “No worries, I’ve seen enough today. I’ll wait until you properly introduce him to us.” She gave Zoya a knowing glance. 

By how things looked, that might actually happen at some point. Zoya picked up her phone, quickly typing a reply to Nikolai. 

Because somehow, she couldn’t wait to see him again, soulmate or not. 


End file.
